Numero Uno

So my posts are few and far between. I try but I'm gone most of the time working and when I do get home the computer is hard at work doing the thing it does best: fulfilling Tyson's obsession with Ron Paul and providing the link so that Tyson can chat with people while I stare and watch. If I do get the computer, it's not like I have any privacy to sit and think about what I want to write; it's our only source of entertainment lately so when it's on all eyes are on it.

Tyson is away and I finally have the computer to myself, but I have so much to say that I'm lost for words. It's like looking a map of the universe and trying to decide the first place I want to visit.

So rather than say something interesting, I thought I would just ramble on about things that matter to me lately or that I've been thinking about a lot.

First, my first official review is coming up on Thursday at work. I don't know what to expect, I love the people I work with but there's something weird about going into the conference and trying to have a serious review when your supervisor just made a joke the day before about how you were going to fill his office with gas from farts. It makes it even more weird because I don't know if they'll bring up compensation and I don't know if it's a topic I can avoid. I tried searching online for the 'proper' way things are suppose to happen, but I had no luck. I don't know if it's standard to get a raise at your first review (of course assuming you do a good job) or if you're suppose to ask for a raise, or if it's too soon to even bring it up.

I was thinking yesterday that if they don't give me a raise, then no matter how much I love my job currently, it won't be worth it to stay any longer. The cost of living is way more expensive here than it was in Texas and at my current rate I'm making less money than I was as a first year teacher in Texas. Now the "perks" are something else and the stress level is like 1/10000th of that of a teacher, but there comes a point when you just have to do what's right for your future. Call me selfish, but I'm my biggest concern. I have to make sure numero uno is taken care of. I thought, if I don't get a raise, then I'll just stay until my lease is up and then move to New Hampshire and try again.

The other thing I've been thinking about lately is religion. I have a lot of strong opinions that I rarely voice about Christianity, and maybe it's just because it's the anniversary of Roe vs. Wade, but abortions and politics as well. For a long time now I've had the opinion that Christians' shouldn't be so concerned about abortion. For anyone who believes in God or Heavenly Father, or whatever else you might choose to call him, I ask you what you honestly believes happens to those unborn babies? Do you think they go to Hell? NO! They get to go to the best place of all, Heaven. Isn't that why we were sent here? To be tested, to learn, to fail, to succeed? Instead of focusing so much on saving unborn children who are just going to go to Heaven and get to skip this "so called life" why not focus on saving the souls of their mothers who are already here? Besides that, doesn't it say in the Bible and (for the LDS) the Book of Mormon that agency, or the freedom to choose for yourself, is the greatest gift God could give us? Why are so many people trying to take that gift away from others? God gave them the right to choose, it was his gift, who are you to take away that gift? Also for the LDS, isn't that why we fought the war in Heaven? Because "the star of the morning" (see D&C) wanted to force us down the path of righteousness? We fought a WAR because we wanted to be able to choose the right instead of being forced down that path. We did this with the understanding that a few would be lost, but this was the path that was chosen by us, by Heavenly Father, by Christ. Now I, personally, wouldn't have an abortion but I would at least like to know that it is by choice and not force. Imagine the resent you would feel if you were forced to have a child that you didn't want; that poor child would either grow up being resented, adopted if they were lucky, in foster care, or some other unfortunate circumstance. I just realized how long this post is and I'm done.

If you give me the chance, I will choose the right. If you make me do right, I will covet the wrong.